At the End of Christmas Day

Hello Poetry Lovers

Welcome back to another Yuletide Special.

Today’s poem penned by the wonderful poet Heather Mary Sullivan still has the cynical theme running through these seasonal posts but it’s warm and hilarious.

See how many memories flood back for you. It certainly took me back. Read on

At the End of Christmas Day

Another Christmas over

The turkey bones are bare

The tree has shed its needles

And it’s looking rather bare!

Granny’s in her rocking chair

She’s singing cos she’s merry

A paper hat across her face

Cos she’s overdosed on sherry!

The Christmas pud was set ablaze

When we smothered it in brandy

Grandad’s telling dirty jokes

After drinking half a shandy!

There are no more pigs in blankets

The pringles have gone soft

Poor auntie Carol’s peed her pants

Always happens when she coughs!

The kids are watching top of the pops

To see who’s topped the charts

Dad keeps shifting in his chair

And wafting sprouty farts.

Someone’s hidden the remote control

There’s a huge queue for the loo

I took the dog out for a walk

And there’s tinsel in his poo!

We’ve opened all our presents

With oohs and aahs and smiles

I got jewellery, clothes and chocolates

And some ointment for my piles!

The mince pies have been eaten

My sisters on the gin

My bloke keeps scratching his balls like mad

How did he get glitter on his foreskin?

The cat’s come home now they’ve all gone

Curled up traumatised in her bed

So that’s another Christmas over

Where are the pills for my aching head?

Heather Mary Sullivan

Wasn’t that a terrific poem, PL’s. Thank you so much, Heather for conjuring up those memories.

Treat yourself to Heather’s hilarious collection

Contact me if you would like a copy, or the lady herself on Facebook.

Thanks for tuning in, PL’s. We’ll be back with more poetry Yuletide action real soon….

Yawntide

Hello Poetry Lovers

I know! I know! We’re still in November but I couldn’t resist sneaking a Yuletide piece in here.

Now, I’m sorry (or am I?) that its on the pessimistic side and I promise to write a more positive one shortly.

However, the older we get, the less magical Christmas becomes. Perhaps because we hark back to our childhood and the excitement of it all. It just becomes flat the older we get.

Anyway do read on.

Yawntide

Yuletide is coming and the nut roast is getting fat

intense Christmas shopping to get loads of tat

Buying edible bargains that won’t survive next Sunday

and obligatory chocolate coins that end up being thrown away

because let’s face it, they taste quite vile

but somehow you have to go that extra mile

Driving you to the kid’s Selection Box

while you dream of receiving designer frocks

The family leave half their Christmas dinner

while you wash up, you promise you’ll get thinner

Christmas night has a taste of the anti-climactic

But come the Boxing Day party, you’ll get paralytic

H Moulson 2025

Well, that was a bit on the miserable side, wasn’t it, PL’s. So please send in your own Yuletide pieces to eclipse this cynicism. Answers on a postcard please …..

Thanks for tuning in, Poetry Lovers. We’ll be back with more poetry action real soon….

Interview with Sarah Boyd


Hello Poetry Lovers

Welcome back to the Talk Show studio!

(Fierce applause)

Our special guest today is talented poet and runner up in this year’s Arts Richmond Poetry Competition, Sarah Boyd!!

(Rapturous applause)

Welcome to the show, Sarah.

Don’t mind Dobby there!

Pleasure to be here, Heather.

(Looks at Dobby nervously)

Pay no attention to Dobby’s growling. It’s a sign of affection (I think).

So Sarah, please fill us in on your background

I worked in magazine publishing for many years which included coming up with regular articles, so I’ve been involved in writing for a long time.

That’s a great background.

When did poetry become a part of your life?

At primary school I wrote an extremely long poem about Noah’s Ark, all in rhyming couplets, which I was very proud of. Sadly I can’t find a copy of it!

Nothing more until lockdown, when I started writing poems to avoid making banana bread and sourdough.

Then in 2024 I decided to apply for the MA Writing Poetry run by Poetry School and Newcastle University – it’s part-time over two years and I’m halfway through. It’s really enjoyable.

I’m so impressed with that, Sarah. It sounds a great course. And I wish you could find that poem.

Who were your biggest influences ?

As part of the MA we have to do a lot of reading so I’m influenced by whoever I happen to be studying at the time.

But I would say my poetry owes something to the work of Caroline Bird, Emily Berry, Selima Hill and the Martian poets of the 1970s and 80s. And to countless other poets.

Some wonderful poets mentioned there.

Are you working on anything at the moment?

Finishing my MA! I have at least 60 more poems to generate by next summer.  

I do hope to have a pamphlet or book of poems out eventually. Watch this space.

We can’t wait, Sarah.

So, what’s the best poetry gig you’ve ever done? And the Worst?!

My Poetry Performance gig this November, when I was featured poet, was probably the best.

My worst was when I was a last minute addition to a charity fundraiser.

On the night I found out I was the first act and the audience hadn’t had a chance to properly warm up with drinks.

The compere had told me what he’d say to introduce my poems, then he said something totally different which threw me.

I think most people were really there for the fund-raising raffle and the meal rather than poetry which was fair enough!

Oh these things are painful but they’re also a learning curve.

So happy your Poetry Performance feature was your best one. You were wonderful.

(Our esteemed guest gets her coat on)

You look in a hurry, Sarah. Aren’t we going to the Fallow Deer for a coffee?

(Our guest looks embarrassed)

I said she wouldn’t like it, Dobby! Let’s leg it quick! Dilly Orme’s waiting for us!

Oh don’t worry, I’m used to it by now.

I guess it’s the MaxPax vending machine for me again!

Wasn’t Sarah a wonderful guest, Poetry Lovers

(Vast Applause and standing ovation).

Thanks for visiting the Talk Show studio, PL’s. We’ll be back with more poetry action real soon…

Milk Bottle Tops

Hello Poetry Lovers

Today I have chosen to share with you this unique piece Milk Bottle Tops by talented poet Trisha Broomfield.

Not only is it upbeat with humorous traits, it also reflects on the turmoil and anguish that can be covered up by the everyday mundane tasks we do.

There is a very poignant side to this poem. Read on…..

Milk Bottle Tops

That’s all it took,

the indent of my thumb on the green foil top,

becoming yours on a full cream pint,

the kettle on the boil

the teapot warming,

you taking the creamy top of the milk

for your cornflakes,

me pulling a face

(school milk had a lot to answer for).

The echo of Radio 2,

Daily Mirror on the cold stove,

toast in perfect squares

marmalade spread spare,

and a break of eczema on the back of your hand,

the only sign of the turmoil within.

Trisha Broomfield

Wasn’t that a wonderful and vivid piece?! Thank you so much, Trisha. More please!!

Thanks for tuning in, PL’s. We’ll be back with more poetry adventures real soon….

Many a True Word

Hello Poetry Lovers

Today I would like to feature Sharron Green’s wonderful and painfully true piece about us all as poets. It’s humorous and extremely observational.

From her inspirational Willing Words collection, full of similar profound pieces, this is really worth a read – but beware of uncomfortable truths!!! Ouch!

Many A True Word

Never trust a poet,

they are wearing a disguise,

you might think they are listening

but they are plotting lies.

Like magpies they are spying gems

that others haven’t spotted,

just watch and they will swipe them

and soon they’ll be re-potted.

You’ll think – where did that come from?

It sounds so fresh and new!

But someone else inspired it,

it could even be you!

So never trust a poet

they are at least two-faced,

though their work is eco friendly

as no word goes to waste.

rhymes n roses 2024

Wasn’t that such a revealing piece about us?! Thank you, Sharron. More please.

Do visit Sharron’s magical website for more poetry and books. Treat yourselves.

http://rhymesnroses.com

Thanks for tuning in, PL’s. We’ll be back with more poetry action real soon….

Remembering Carla…

Hello Poetry Lovers

Today I would like to remember Carla Scarano.

A lovely vibrant Italian poet who brought so much to the poetry community, Carla left us very quickly in 2023. A very prolific poet, she gave us a legacy of wonderful poetry.

I particularly loved her pieces on cooking which shared food and relationships in one delicious pot.

This is one of my favourites.

Parsley

The fringed leaves look like shredded shamrocks

packed in plastic bags from the supermarket,

its freshness fades in the fridge

better to let the stem drink in a glass of water

to last longer, give it a chance to survive

before you chop or tear it to pieces

to season fish, mushrooms or boil in ragu;

its flavour warms the evening light

when the shadows grow deep and we sit

our faces over the steaming soup

talking about the day

how did it go, any news?

C Scarano

What a lovely personal piece. There you are, just a little tribute. You’re gone but never forgotten, Carla.

Thanks for tuning in, PL’s. We’ll be back with more poetry action real soon

Dancing in Quicksand

Hello Poetry Lovers

Well, we’re on the tip of Halloween and I’d like to feature Sharron Green’s very striking piece Dancing in Quicksand.

As well as its nightmarish tones, there are twists of other emotions too, making it a very clever poem. Do read on for this atmospheric piece

Dancing in Quicksand

Aeons ago we came to the ball,
a nightmare from which there’s no leaving.
Like a stuck record we spin in a groove,
so dizzy now that we’re heaving.

The ballroom once splendid is tarnished,
the crystal and gold have been scuffed,
in our finest we stood, eating all that we could,
and now it’s all gone we are stuffed.

The band plays a Titanic medley
as chairs round the dance floor swap places,
the ballgowns bob In the bubbling mud
as we stare at the horrified faces.

What we need is a fairy godmother,
to whisk us back with a gaze so adoring,
to the days when our planet was healthy,
and our politics simple and boring.

@rhymes _n_roses

Wasn’t that a wonderful and relevant piece?! Thank you so much, Sharron. More please…

Thanks for tuning in, Poetry Lovers. We’ll be back with more action real soon….